Bush Humor From the Onion

President Bush recently toured America to survey the damage caused by his disastrous presidency.

Another great parody from the Onion:

Just tragic! 😉

Proposed Hurricane Names Honoring the Bush Administration

These are great…

From the Daily Kos:

Cheers and Jeers: Tuesday

by Bill in Portland Maine

Tue May 27, 2008 at 05:39:22 AM PDT

From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE…

Hurricane season starts in five days. If the Grand Committee of Meterological Poobahs hasn’t come up with their list of names yet, may I suggest the following as a way of commemorating the greatest hits of the Bush administration in this, its final year:

Ashcroft
Brownie
Condi
Dick
Enron
Feith
Gonzales
Hughes
Iraq
Jack Abramoff
KBR
Lieberman
Matalin
Negroponte
Osama
Perle
Quagmire
Rummy
Scooter
Turdblossom
Uranium from Africa
Viceroy Bremer
Wolfowitz
Xenophobe
Yoo
Zell

On second thought, that would really be unfair. To the hurricanes.

 

Scott McClellan: Outing the Bush Administration

Some harsh criticisms and allegations were brought to light Tuesday as an ex-spokesman for President Bush releases a new book.

Scott McClellan’s What Happened: Inside the Bush White House and Washington’s Culture of Deception details his time as White House Press Secrerary and gives a crushing negative perspective about the president’s handling of the administration. According to the Politico, who was the first to break the story yesterday:

• McClellan charges that Bush relied on “propaganda” to sell the war.

• He says the White House press corps was too easy on the administration during the run-up to the war.

• He admits that some of his own assertions from the briefing room podium turned out to be “badly misguided.” 

• The longtime Bush loyalist also suggests that two top aides held a secret West Wing meeting to get their story straight about the CIA leak case at a time when federal prosecutors were after them — and McClellan was continuing to defend them despite mounting evidence they had not given him all the facts.

• McClellan asserts that the aides — Karl Rove, the president’s senior adviser, and I. Lewis “Scooter” Libby, the vice president’s chief of staff — “had at best misled” him about their role in the disclosure of former CIA operative Valerie Plame’s identity.

Karl Rove and the White House has disputed McClellan’s book. McClellan also describes the involvement of others such as Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, Dick Cheney, Scooter Libby, and Bush’s Texas “connections.”

Read the story from the New York Times here (free registration may be required).
 

 

Jenna Bush Gets Hitched

Jenna Bush, 26, was quietly married this weekend at the Bush family’s Crawford Ranch. The bride wore a white Oscar de la Renta gown and no veil. The press was not invited, but the White House released pictures late Sunday afternoon. Her grandparents, George H. W. Bush and Barbara, spoke at the ceremony.

Jenna wed Henry Hager, 30, less than one year after he proposed at dawn atop Cadillac Mountain in Acadia National Park on Maine’s coast. The couple were married around 7:30 p.m. Saturday evening.

From the AP:

Jenna’s twin sister, Barbara, was maid of honor and 14 other women were in her “house party.” Barbara Bush wore a long, moonstone blue dress with a low-cut back. The women in the “house party” were clad in seven different styles of knee-length dresses in seven different colors that match the palette of Texas wildflowers — blues, greens, lavenders and pinky reds.

The ceremony began about a half hour or so before sunset. The couple stood at a cross, made of beige colored Texas limestone, that was erected near the ranch’s man-made lake. The cross and altar, made of the same stone used to construct the Bush’s ranch house, will be a landmark at the ranch for years to come. The Rev. Kirbyjon Caldwell of Windsor Village United Methodist Church in Houston officiated.

Henry Hager met Jenna during her father’s 2004 re-election campaign. He graduated from Wake Forest University and worked as an aide to Bush’s former top political adviser Karl Rove. He is set to receive a master’s degree in business administration later this month from the University of Virginia’s Darden School of Business.

After the wedding, the couple is rumored to be honeymooning in Europe, although the White House would not comment. After that, they plan to live in a two-bedroom, two-bath town house on the south side of Baltimore. She plans to return to teaching and he will work for Constellation Energy, a power supplier based in Maryland.

You have to be impressed in how well Jenna has matured from her early days in the White House. She could have picked a huge, overpriced, gaudy wedding at the White House, but chose to keep it simple and away from the cameras.

By the way, why does their wedding cake look like the top is going to come tumbling off?

Congratulations to the happy couple!

President Bush to Reduce Troop Size and Time in Middle East

President Bush will announce today his plan to decrease troop size and tour of duty lengths per the Washington Post. General Petraeus’ testimony on Capitol Hill this week seems to have left an impression with Bush.

I will honestly believe this when I see it happening with my own two eyes.

From the Washington Post (free registration required):

President Bush plans to announce today that he will cut Army combat tours in Iraq from 15 months to 12 months, returning rotations to where they were before last year’s troop buildup in an effort to alleviate the tremendous stress on the military, administration officials said.

The move is in response to intense pressure from service commanders who have expressed anxiety about the toll of long deployments on their soldiers and, more broadly, about the U.S. military’s ability to confront unanticipated threats. Bush will announce the decision during a national speech, in which aides said he will also embrace Army Gen. David H. Petraeus’s plan to indefinitely suspend a drawdown of forces.

The bottom line seems to be that after pulling out the extra forces Bush sent last year, the United States will keep about 140,000 troops in Iraq at least through the November presidential election. In the short term, the debate in Washington instead will focus more intently on trade-offs at home, including the strain on the armed forces and the Treasury.

The elimination of 15-month tours will restore deployments to an equal balance of one year in the war zone followed by one year at home. Defense Secretary Robert M. Gates extended the tours almost exactly a year ago to provide enough forces for Bush’s “surge” of 20,000 additional combat troops and 8,000 support troops. But Army leaders have complained about the strain.

Gen. Richard A. Cody, the Army’s outgoing vice chief of staff, told the House Armed Services Committee yesterday that the Army is “out of balance” and that the current demand for forces in Iraq and Afghanistan “exceeds the sustainable supply.” He added that “soldiers, families, support systems and equipment are stretched and stressed by the demands of lengthy and repeated deployments, with insufficient recovery time.”

“Stretched” to say the least. Where do you see this most notably? How about when there is a natural disaster such as flooding or tornado clean-up and there is little of the National Guard left to go around. It’s the same scenario with boarder duty right now. A lot of land to keep an eye on, little troops to assign down south.

Being around the military for as long as I have, I just never count on anything until it actually happens. I never understood the whole 15 month tour. It’s bad enough to have to stay focused on your mission for a year, but 15 months? I only hope that Bush’s plan is true and followed through as promised.

Please, please stop by America Supports You and send a message to the troops.

Remains Found of Last Missing/Captured Soldier in Iraq

Staff Sgt. Matt Maupin is finally coming home. Captured during an ambush in April of 2004, SSG Maupin’s remains have been confirmed as being his through DNA analysis.

Read the story from the Cincinnati Enquirer.

My heart and prayers go out to Matt’s family.

More than 100 people gathered Sunday night in a candlelight vigil in a drizzling rain outside the Eastgate office of the Yellow Ribbon Support Center, the organization founded by Matt Maupin’s parents to help other military people serving overseas. (From the Cincinnati Enquirer)

Easter at the White House:Waiting for Your Caption

Ummm… what is this picture saying to you? 😉

Dear Iraq, Be My Valentine

Bush sounds like he is taking sides with his Democratic successor based on his/her support for the war in Iraq. Interesting perspective from David Ignatius of Real Clear Politics:

Bush seems more comfortable with Sen. Hillary Clinton as a successor than Sen. Barack Obama, judging by his comments in the Fox News Interview. He told Wallace that he had predicted a Clinton victory months ago “because I knew that she understands the klieg lights and understands the pressures.” He also defended Bill Clinton, saying that he understands why the former president “wants to campaign hard for his wife.” He seems confident that Clinton won’t abruptly withdraw from Iraq, regardless of her campaign rhetoric.

As for Obama, Bush was almost disdainful. “I certainly don’t know what he believes in,” Bush told Fox. He criticized Obama’s statements last year that he would be ready to attack al-Qaeda bases in Pakistan unilaterally, if necessary, and that he was prepared to meet with Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.

The editorial also states that the Iraq issue makes it easy for Bush to back up McCain because of the veteran’s stance on completing what the Bush Administration started in the middle east. But let’s face it, it doesn’t matter who Bush supports as a presidential candidate. Much of the public is tired of American soldiers dying for not OUR freedom, but another’s country’s age-old political and religious problems. Ultimately, it will be the voters’ decision which blue candidate will be taking up residency in the White House next January.

The Top 10 Bushisms of 2007

Another list from Daniel Kurtzman from About.com:
10. “And there is distrust in Washington. I am surprised, frankly, at the amount of distrust that exists in this town. And I’m sorry it’s the case, and I’ll work hard to try to elevate it.” –interview on National Public Radio, Jan. 29, 2007

9. “I fully understand those who say you can’t win this thing militarily. That’s exactly what the United States military says, that you can’t win this military.” –on the need for political progress in Iraq, Washington, D.C., Oct. 17, 2007

8. “One of my concerns is that the health care not be as good as it can possibly be.” –on military benefits, Tipp City, Ohio, April 19, 2007

7. “Mr. Prime Minister, thank you for your introduction. Thank you for being such a fine host for the OPEC summit.” –addressing Australian Prime Minister John Howard at the APEC Summit. Later, in the same speech: “As John Howard accurately noted when he went to thank the Austrian troops there last year…” –referring to Australian troops as “Austrian troops,” Sept. 7, 2007

6. “My relationship with this good man is where I’ve been focused, and that’s where my concentration is. And I don’t regret any other aspect of it. And so I — we filled a lot of space together.” –on British Prime Minister Tony Blair, Washington, D.C., May 17, 2007

5. “You helped our nation celebrate its bicentennial in 17 — 1976.” –to Queen Elizabeth, Washington, D.C., May 7, 2007 (Watch video clip)

4. “The question is, who ought to make that decision? The Congress or the commanders? And as you know, my position is clear — I’m a Commander Guy.” –deciding he is no longer just “The Decider,” Washington, D.C., May 2, 2007 (Watch video clip)

3. “Information is moving — you know, nightly news is one way, of course, but it’s also moving through the blogosphere and through the Internets.” –Washington, D.C., May 2, 2007

2. “There are some similarities, of course (between Iraq and Vietnam). Death is terrible.” –Tipp City, Ohio, April 19, 2007

1. “As yesterday’s positive report card shows, childrens do learn when standards are high and results are measured.” –on the No Child Left Behind Act, Washington, D.C., Sept. 26, 2007 (Watch video clip)